The Aberdeen Foundation

THE NIGHT BEFORE STARWARS
[ based on ‘Twas The Night Before Christmas, by Major Henry Livingston, Jr. ]

'Twas the night before Star Wars

and all through the White House
Not a creature was stirrin'

'cept a beady-eyed Bush mouse
Large corporate stockings were hung

in congressional halls with care
In hopes that fat military contracts

soon would be theirs
Ronnie at the Oval Office desk

with ray-gun in hand
Poised to fill corporate coffers

with one stroke of his pen
And lookin' up from the big desk

he smiled into the camera
"Weelll. . . Let me spin you a yarn

'bout when I was on the Ponderosa
Oh, no---never mind---

I've got more pressin' things to do
This here's my holiday address

to the nation and for you. . .

We must put giant ray-guns

in the heavens up above
Cover the whole damn sky

with a missile protective glove
Let the Christian bells ring

from every church steeple
We're doin' our level best

for the salvation of we the people
Now, way back in history

we first made the A-bomb
And them damn Ruskies followed suit

with much ado and aplomb
So we made an even bigger one

out of hydrogen, or was it sand?
And then invented the MX-missile

to protect our great land
And them Commies did likewise

they built the same damn thing
For some reason they're afraid of us

'bout as much as we're afraid of them
Now, just 'cause them damn Ruskies

have nearly always followed suit
Is no reason not to give the corporate folk

all the taxpayers' hard-earned loot
To build a giant ray-gun shield

in the 'viornment of space
'Cause no doubt this is the best way

to protect the human race
If them Commies copy us again, weelll. . .

on earth their may be great fires
But it won't matter to me and Junior

'cause we will have long since retired
Princess Nancy with her pastry chef

and I in my stretch limo
Wish all you faithful stockholders well

here's the check for our ammo
Now don't listen to them 'vironmentalists

they're just talkin' crap
And them psuedo-scientifics

we're gonna blow them off the map
And don't listen to them peace

and 'uman rights agitators
They're all smokin' in the Commies' camp

and followin' the evil Ralph Nader
To all of you who have no health care

and the homeless vet in the gutter
Weelll. . . Cheer up! Don't complain

Star Wars is what matters
I'm a seasoned Hollywood veteran

and I know exactly what to do
Kill all them leftist Commie bastards

and may the Ray-gun force be with you

As history's page turns to a new century

Bush Junior blows his ballistic whistle
Like a nation whose lost all of her sanity

lead by a truly misguided missile
"Now, let's scrap all them ABM treaties

that took us thirty years to attain
Welcome to the New World Disorder

founded on greed's war-machine gain
On Ashcroft out-in-right-Rumsfield

on Agnew and Nixon
On 'Uncle Tom' Powell

and Bill Clinton's young vixen"
And behind our backs they exclaim

while bowing to the totally-wrong Right
"Up ahead soon lies Armageddon

there's bound to be one hell of a fight" *

Science for Peace American Red Cross

DEDICATED TO: Clara Barton, founder of the American Red Cross, who delivered medical supplies and provided care for wounded soldiers during The Civil War; unfortunately, it is going to take far more than the Red Cross to clean up this mess.

*FootNote: Inspired by a Johnny Carson skit on The Tonight Show. In the author's opinion, the current proposal of putting lasers weapons in space is may perhaps be the very worst idea that the human race has ever conceived.

No part of this material may be reproduced or utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including printing, photocopying, recording or by any information storage or retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher and signed by the author. Inquiries: Freedom Tracks Records or requested via eMail. Essays entitled Revolution and Revolution - Side B are open copyright and may be reproduced as often as one likes.